All right had to do a little rant right now, that i’m really not going to be happy about later in the run but might as well just speak my mind.
Today my mother and I were talking about my trip to Chicago yesterday with my friends, and she asked
Mom: “was your boyfriend there?”
me: yes he was and he was in a lot of pain because of his back, he’s in the process of doing workman comp and all that stuff
mom: “oh so he’s another D**, you need to get out now”
UHM HOW ABOUT NOT MOTHER! He’s nowhere near D** if you really knew D** and got to know about him you would have understood the true meaning behind him.
Its like I love my mother but she doesn’t need to ruin my relationship with her comments, if she really knew and got to know my boyfriend she would understand that he’s completely different from D**.
K**-actually goes out and does stuff with me, very funny and friendly, gets to know people, doesn’t do drugs or any of that stuff
D**-Didn’t do anything with me, we always sat at home, he was a druggie and an alcoholic, he was abusive, and threatened my life but I was scared to leave him in the end but honestly I’m glad we did go our separate ways because i’m A LOT happier in the long run. Yes I was typical girl and had that bad heartbreak because he made me feel like i was in love with him but in the long run after the tears and heartbreak i really sat down and thought about it and should have seen the signs of being in an abusive relationship. But I was young and stupid and ignored the signs.
No girl in their right mind should EVER be in an abusive relationship, but it’s in our nature sometimes to ignore the signs because we think we are in love with that person, when in reality he didn’t love you in the long run. He could only of “loved” you because of how good you were in bed to how pretty you made him look. NO woman should ever be in that situation. I knew it was time when one night he did put his hands on me because he had a party at his house and I was ready to go to bed, and he put me in a choke hold. Have I ever told anyone about this? Yes I did, I told my best friend months after it happened. Why you ask? Because I was scared to tell anyone in the first place. It was just a stupid move on my part for not leaving him when he did, my excuse was “he was drunk that night.” I was just scared thinking that no one will ever love me again like he did that’s why I never left when I did and that was a stupid move on my part because I was stuck with an abusive man for months on end and he wouldn’t let me go out and do anything he was running my life. Only if my mother truly knew D** she would of understood why.
It’s like this is why sometimes I can’t open up to her about anything because she will always judge me, and I HATE IT! I wish I could have those mother daughter moments but I can’t. I know you all are probably thinking that i’m a selfish person and cold hearted or something, but if you really knew you would understand. Hell when I had my break ups in the past she was never really there for me she would say oh just move on there’s better people for you somewhere but she never really sat down with me and had a talk. She was really never there for me in the past. I would love to have that mother daughter relationship but it’s just hard sometimes trying to get that with her. Honestly it DOES bother me a bit that I never had that when I was younger or have it now but it is what it is.
Maybe that’s why I haven’t brought my boyfriend around is because you will judge him without getting to know him, or say something mean or anything. K** is a nice guy and actually goes out of his way to make me happy, unlike the past where I had to go to their houses, but K** actually comes out to me and takes me to the movies or takes me to dinner, brings me lunch at work. He’s honestly a GREAT guy and I wish you would get to know him, but when the time is right maybe I will bring him around when you won’t judge him without getting to know him.
But here’s for all of you readers out there, Why do we always compare people when we don’t know them? We shouldn’t be comparing people for no reason, for not knowing the person, or whatever the case maybe. So why do it in the first place? I mean what’s the purpose of judging someone without getting to know that person? There’s so many questions you can ask yourself about comparing a person without knowing them but just think about it really “why do you do it in the first place?” Shouldn’t people not judge people for the way they look, how they act, who there friends are, who there dating, etc. So why judge in the first place? Think about it everyone why do you judge a person?
until next time